Why am I here?

Haven’t written anything for a long time. Not that I don’t have anything to say, hehe, if you know me in person, you definitely know what I mean. But I have been doing some thinking lately, “Can my Blog be truly meaningful? i.e., can my thoughts/ideas make this world a better place?” Please, don’t laugh, I am dead serious.

I have to admit that I am still an idealist to some degree. I still have the dream to build a better world. I like to see people laugh and I hate to see those nasty things out there. When I start this Blog, I have a secret agenda. (Heehee, again, don’t laugh…) I want to influence others through my writing and to somehow make this a slightly better world. (Similar to what Ender’s Brother and Sister, Peter and Valentine, did in the book … of course, to a lesser degree.) I have strong beliefs in certain things and I want others to share such beliefs. I hope that my Blog can be relevant and thought-provoking and somehow bring some good to this world.

However, I am not too sure about it now. I still have things to say but I really don’t know if words alone will change anything in any noticeable way. People don’t change and they will keep believing what they choose to believe till they die. For example, I have so much to say about this “Anti-Japanese Products Movement” in China, but I didn’t write anything at all. NOTHING. ZERO. EMPTY. The reason is simple: I really don’t believe my writing will change this irrational movement in any material way. I don’t even think people care what others have to say. After witnessing some heated discussion on various BBS forums, I noticed that people take way more pleasure and interests in name-calling and cursing than anything else. I suddenly realized the fact that I simply can’t convince anybody for anything. This fact really hurts me. The world is a darker place than I thought and you can simply do nothing about it.

Should I keep writing, even if it doesn't do anything? I don’t know. I really don’t.